Table Manners

If you don't have any toddlers in your home right now you've probably forgotten just how entertaining their eating habits are. I prefer to use that term to others that are equally appropriate: lacking, messy, appalling.



First there's the coordination problem. A young toddler needs lots and lots of practice to build the skills and muscle memory to successfully take a spoon of food from their bowl to their mouth. Depending on the day, they can lose as much as 80% of their food to the table, highchair, bib, and floor. I understand now why a lot of cultures prefer sticky rice. The other day when we fed Jake and Viva buttered long grain rice it was a mess to clean up. After making the mistake once of feeding Bentley couscous, I've not ever served it up for the twins--tiny, dry, round balls?! What was I thinking? It took weeks to find all the hide-outs.

Jake is much more skilled than Viva is with using a spoon. This might be because he has had more practice because Viva often chooses to use her hands rather than a spoon. This is okay when eating large pasta noodles, but not so great when she tries to scoop up soggy corn flakes. Jake sometimes eats with two spoons.


Here is a rare shot of Bentley eating:


I say rare because the boy rarely eats. When he does he's a very neat eater. He does not like getting his hands or face dirty. Jake tends to be like that, too. Viva likes to be messy. She has no qualms about getting her hands sticky, gooey, slimy, greasy, whatever. I'm sure that's a useful trait in lots of career fields. I don't see Bentley becoming a sculptor or massage therapist or meat ball roller.

Here's a final shot of Jake demonstrating his newest eating habit:


He makes us laugh when perhaps we ought not to. Ms Manners would surely find his antics totally unacceptable. Yet, how is a toddler to make sense of our eating customs? You can eat bread and cookies with your fingers, but salad and pasta must be eaten with a fork or spoon.

Will it be harder or easier to teach them table manners when they are older and we can discuss the whys and wherefores with them? Our conversations with Bentley lead me to believe it won't get any easier.