The Delights of Potty Training

Back in my B.K. (before kids) days I read parenting books. Now that I'm actually in the violent throws of parenting I still like the idea of reading the books, but I don't find the free time quite as often. Anyway... back in the days, I believed that children should be potty trained at 1 year of age. I read about how it's only in the United States (and other developed countries), and only in the past 50 years or so, that parents have chosen to delay training until 2, 3, or even 4 years of age. In 3rd world nations where disposable diapers just aren't a viable option, children are still trained around 1. And in our country it's only since disposable diapers became cheap (relatively) that it became easy for parents to avoid toilet training.

Anyway, I had lots of grand ideas on potty training Bentley at 1 year of age. Because if it can be done, of course I would be able to do it! Fast forward to Bentley's 1st birthday, with Kara on her on again off again bed rest regime, pregnant with twins. I decided to wait. Since then I've skimmed a few more books, read a few websites, and purchased a few boxes of Pull Ups at Costco. I decided that 1 day training wasn't for us, but when a friend suggested 3 day training I thought ok - that sounds like a go!

Step stools? Check. Toddler underwear? Check. Rewards for training? Check. We were ready to go!

The gist of the program involved a sudden transition from diapers to underwear and the notion that if you run your child to the toilet evertime they start to go within 3 days it will "click" and they'll be trained. It works for many children. Further internet searches on this book AFTER my attempt at training revealed there are plenty of kids it doesn't work for as well.

My sweet child turned into a bit of a monster by the end of day 2 (and, I will admit, so did I). We both wanted out of the house, but I wasn't keen on having him pee his pants in public. And the book told us we should stay home and concentrate on our potty training for 3 days straight. So, although Bentley was pulling on the door handle and screaming "me out" by the end of day 2, we kept at it. In my search for a magic bullet I even gave in and bought a toddler toilet to try - a big concession for me, as I believe in taking full advantage of the fact we have indoor plumbing.

Bentley is still young enough that he really wants to please me. So he did (and is doing) an awesome job of letting us know when he needs to use the toilet. Unfortunately, although he's willing to sit on the toilet for about 2 seconds then he tells us he's done. He repeats this routine of requesting "potty"!!!, then jumping off without any results about 20 times in a row after which he uses his underwear or pull up because he's way too stressed to go on the toilet.

He's taking his stress over this whole change in his life style out on his siblings, me, and his Grandma. He's started hitting, biting, knocking over... not that he never hit before, but it's become much more frequent this past week.

After day 3 I couldn't handle it anymore (and neither could he), so we moved on to the diaper industries great brain child of pull ups (make them look a tiny bit like underwear instead of a diaper and charge customers twice as much - it really is a clever plan!!!). We still run to the toilet about 40 times a day, but at least I don't have to do that AND stay in the house all day AND change his pants and underwear 6 times a day. He's still stressed out, but the peanut butter cookie dough and I are trying to make him happier!

On the plus side, he can hold it for a LONG time, so night training is not an issue! Starting on day 2 of our venture into this toilet training Bentley has woken up dry every morning after 10 straight hours in bed - I'm impressed! So we're just going to tell people he's night trained, and if they want to assume that means of course he's day trained as well...

:-)

It's been a rough week at our house. I've had to deal with my pride (dang it, why can't I make this simple process work!) as well as with a stressed out toddler, an abused Genevieve (she gets the brunt of Bentley's *attention*), and a slightly grumpy Jackson (we hypothisize he's teething - better that than say he's often this grumpy!!).

Wish us luck. Hopefully it will click sometime soon before I actually start praying that Bentley will forget this whole experience and just keep using his diaper to give me some peace from the frequent bathroom pit stops!